Have you taken your time to study the situation around you
in recent time?

Is your husband satisfied with you even as you don’t seem
to be having enough time for him unlike you were doing before
the arrival of the kids?

Check your marital life occasionally to seem that nothing you are
doing to the kids is affecting your relationship with your husband.

I have experienced a situation that a father began to be jealous of
his own kids simply because their mother concentrated more of her
time to the nursing of the kids than the time she had for him.

I must warn you that you need to balance your time between the your
husband and your kids. If you can’t do this simple time management
then you better prepare yourself for the inevitable consequences at
the end of the day.

Your marriage should not suffer because your time is devoted much
more to your kid.

You must remember that your man was always there with you before
the coming of your kids and he would always be there with you when
the kids have grown and are ready to leave home to establish their
own families elsewhere.

Your future with your husband is only guaranteed now if you maintain
a loving relationship with him as you do with your kids.

The truth is that you can maintain that balance, if you really want to.
But not everybody can do so.

Give this a deep thought and see if you could work it out pretty good.

Enjoy your parenting efforts.
Sikaz.

Sikaz: Could you tell us your name, location and age?

Naomi: Naomi Aldort is the author of the highly acclaimed book, Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves. advice by phone, in person Parents from around the globe seek Aldort’s and by listening to her CDs and attending her workshops. Her advice columns appear in progressive parenting worldwide and translated to German, French, Hebrew, Dutch, Japanese, Chinese,
Indonesian, Spanish, Japanese and more.

Naomi Aldort is married and a mother of three. Her youngest son is sixteen-year-old cellist Oliver Aldort www.OliverAldort.com Her middle son is nineteen year old composer and self made pianist Lennon Aldort www.LennonAldort.com and the oldest, Jonathan Aldort, is a fourth year student and a writer.

For free newsletter, information on teleclasses, phone sessions and
products: www.NaomiAldort.com or, www.AuthenticParent.com

Sikaz: What is your opinion about parenting; is it worth it?

Naomi: Every experience in life is a worthy one for the person who is passionate about it and chooses it freely. Parenting is a very deeply engaging path and possibly the most satisfying. It helps us mature by moving us from the go-getter to the go-giver. If one were not ready to let go and discover the joy of giving and of surrender, it would be too difficult. The joy of caring for the life of another is the greatest fulfillment.

Sikaz: What is your opinion about breastfeeding?

Naomi: Breastfeeding needs no opinion. It is nature’s design for optimal growth, emotional wellbeing and intelligence. Every baby deserves to be breastfed on cue around the clock for as long as she wants, which is usually a few years. It boosts immunity, intelligence and optimal growth and development as well as secures emotional connection. For the mother is ensures that she bonds and stays physically close at all times.

Sikaz: What are the challenges of working and breastfeeding your baby?

Naomi: I do not recommend working and mothering unless the baby can be
with mother at all times and she is free to connect, care, relate and breastfeed. Babies need constant body contact with mother. Working mothers call me often for advice because their toddler or young child is being difficult. As soon as they stop working the difficulties vanish. The child
does not need money or things money can buy. The child simply needs her mother. I would live in a tent and sell my clothes to be with my child. Create a community, share housing, resources, and activities, and you won’t need to work away from your baby or young child.

Sikaz: What are the things one should look out for while choosing a nanny?

Naomi: Look for a loving person who is willing to learn and follow the mother and father’s ideas of parenting. Her own ideas might clash with what parents prefer for the child. She should read the same parenting books the parents choose.

Many of my clients give my book, Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves, and some of  my CDs, to a new nanny and even bring her to their phone advice with me.A nanny should be with a child while the mother is close by, accomplishing something, but available if needed. Nanny should help the mother and, most of the time, not replace her.

Sikaz: Would you describe your older child’s experience when the younger child was born?

Naomi: My oldest son was present at his brothers’ births. He was very excited and loving when our middle child was born. Then, at the birth of our third child (also at home) my second child declared at the moment of birth: “The baby came out!” He was three and spent the birthing time jumping up and down near me, very happy and caring. My oldest, then seven, was the one who cut the umbilical chord. He was very involved and helpful. Both boys were enchanted by the baby. Now, as young adults and one teenager, they are best of friends.

Sikaz: How would you describe your typical day as a parent?

Naomi: In parenting that honors the children’s inner guide, there is no “typical.” Each day is different. Many hours of breastfeeding, feeding, caring, hugging and snuggling; taking walks to the playground and watching the children play or listening to them and drying their tears. The children led the way by their interests, passions, joys and struggles. I followed by leading the way to where they chose to go, play or study. Often they played all day, needing me for food, breastfeeding and physical care only. Other days I was engaged all day with reading, hiking, singing, solving disputes, dancing or watching their “shows.”

My book, Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves, has many examples of the lives of parents and children, demonstrating how to bring peace, joy and contentment to every challenge: http://naomialdort.com/book.html. In addition, many of my personal parenting stories and those of parents participating in my workshops and phone sessions are available to listen to on CDs, which you can purchase here: http://naomialdort.com/audio-video.html

Sikaz: What is your personal opinion about teenage parenting?

Naomi: By the time the child is a teenager, it is time to let go and trust. It
is crucial to respect teens, allow them space to find who they are and to connect with society, while keeping close bond of care, interest and support. They become best of friends and seek our guidance, if we stay open, honest and respectful. A couple of the stories in the book are about teenagers and answer this question fully. http://naomialdort.com/book.html

Sikaz: What do you think could be done to stop teenagers’ involvements in violence and hard drugs?

Naomi: When children are cared for the way they need through their early years, they are content as teenagers and are busy making friends and becoming adults. Such happy teenagers do not engage in violence or drugs. Violence and drugs are the result of dissatisfaction and emotional pain. Therefore the answer is to heal their pain with love, understanding and meeting their true needs to belong, to connect and to feel valued and unconditionally loved.

The best is to prevent the teenagers from having so much anger and pain so they don’t need to express themselves through violence or to escape the pain through drugs. By studying my book, listening to my many CDs, attending my teleclasses, reading my advice columns and free newsletter, or taking private sessions, parents can learn to raise children who have nothing to rebel against and no anger or anguish to express in destructive ways. When children and teens feel content and connected, they behave well and flourish.

Sikaz: What are the causes of teenage disrespect and how could it be stopped?

Naomi: If we want teenagers to authentically feel a sense of respect for others and for life, we must respect them from the day they are born. They learn respect by being respected. If we control children, tell them what to do or say, interrupt their play, test them, patronize and shame or embarrass them, they will do the same as soon as they can, which is as teenagers. They are our mirrors. If they feel manipulated and controlled, they will show us their despair in ways we call “disrespect.” Instead of seeking respect, we must find out why a youth is so angry, bitter, or careless. Give a teenager space, yet stay caring, interested and connected.

However, even when we treat children with respect and care, as teenagers they sometimes become “allergic” to us. That’s as it should be and this is not
disrespect. We must not take ourselves so seriously as to need their respect.
Instead, we must have a sense of humor and respect for the confusing and difficult stage teenagers are going through. Much of what is called “disrespect” in teenagers, is not really disrespect. If we listen we can address the issue, and if there is no real issue, we can lighten up and have a sense of humor about their age appropriate antics. It is hormonal and transitional; it passes.

The expectation, “My teenager should respect me,” gets in the way of understanding the teenager’s valid reason to be the way he is. In addition, the thought “My teen does not respect me,” is not even true. If you respected his autonomy all along, he does respect you. Yet, this is not his time to show it to you on your terms and in your way. Expecting him to behave on your terms is actually disrespectful. Instead, read between the lines and realize that he can’t express it now and will come around if you trust and respect his process. He loves you and depends on your ability to
flow with his temporary clumsy social skills with you.

A teenager is biologically set-up to be put off by his parents. It is a transition
from being someone’s daughter or son, to being an adult member of society. Teenagers must go through this phase, sometimes with more fanfare and sometimes more sweetly. If we show some understanding rather than judging, teenagers move on and turn back to us when they feel that we see them as equal.

When expecting a teen to be who he is not, we create anger and disconnection. Without such expectation, we can see what he is going through and I realize that it is up to us to respect him and to understand, support and connect with him where he is. A teenager is much more likely to seek parental advice and listen, when the relationshipis void of pressure and manipulation. Kindness and understanding keep the teen close to you at heart, even when he doesn’t show it. Instead of dictating your standards, listen to your teenager.

Sikaz: What is your advice for those who are planning to be parents one day?

Naomi: To have a good time so they don’t feel as though they miss something when the children come along and they can’t do much with themselves. There is not much that they can learn in advance. Having children is always a surprise experience no matter how well you are prepared. But, if they want to learn in advance, reading my book, Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves can be a great preparation,
http://authenticparent.com/ Before they have children, they will grasp the book from the point of the view of the child, remembering how it was for them as children and understanding what nurtured them and what was painful. This will make the path of parenting much clearer.

Sikaz: What is your opinion about books, seminars and workshops on parenting?

Naomi: As an author of a parenting book, Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves, http://authenticparent.com/ I have seen the amazing impact it has on parent-child relationships and on bringing peace and joy to family life. In addition I have seen the impact of counseling http://naomialdort.com/guidance.html and workshop and have  hundreds of testimonials to support the value of reading, listening and attending
my workshops http://naomialdort.com/interviews.html and family intensive retreats, http://naomialdort.com/family-retreat.html

The truth is, no one knows how to be a parent. People learn all other vocations but somehow it is expected that this most difficult of all challenges would just come to us naturally. Parents are shocked to discover that it is not so. They need to understand psychology, the human spirit, trust, child development and mostly, how to let their sown ego get out of the way.

Before you have a child, bring yourself to a point where you are not interested to shape a child into someone YOU want her to be. Be ready to marvel the child for who she is becoming of her own. Therefore choose books and workshops that do not teach old ideas of control (even praise is control and manipulation,) and conditional love. Find those, like my own book and seminars that teach the peaceful way of loving children unconditionally so they can be the best of themselves, not out of fear or a need to get your love, but because they want to, of their own free will.

Sikaz: Are parenting coaches relevant and helpful to parents?

Naomi: If they are supportive of respect, trust and growth, they are enormously valuable!! The difference it makes in the lives of parents and children is substantial. I offer parents coaching by phone internationally
http://naomialdort.com/guidance.html. I offer advice and also deep self-realization work through parenting (when they want to.) You can find the information for these phone sessions on my site.

The cultural idea the parents shouldn’t seek guidance prevents many parents from getting the coaching they need, or from wanting to invest in their own education in parenting. Young parents are likely to spend easily on toys, pizza or other outings, yet they often see themselves as unable to afford a workshop.

Interestingly, it is the more competent parents who often ask for coaching. Realizing that they don’t know is what propels these wise parents to seek guidance. We must start with basic humility: We don’t know the mystery of the unfolding human being. We must learn on the job and coaching can make a world of difference. It takes maturity and wisdom to realize that we don’t know, and it takes courage and humility to seek guidance.

Parents who call me for advice or counseling, either want answers to specific issues, or they want to self-realize and grow through parenting. I provide whatever they seek and their lives and their children’s lives are transformed. They bring peace, joy, and freedom to everyday interaction with their children and loved ones.

Some people say that parenting advice should come from elders in the family. It used to be this way, when society was cyclical and traditions were kept unchanged. Today most parents depart from the old ways. If they assume they know, or if they are swept in mainstream trends, they will eventually find themselves helplessly confused and puzzled by the difficulties that parenting presents. Seeking guidance is a wise choice and the greatest gift to both parent and child.

Sikaz: Some parents seem to be neglecting their parenting activities for their career, what is your opinion on this and its effects on the society at large?

Naomi: All parents love their children. If you ask them, even if they work a lot, they don’t see themselves as “neglecting” their children. Yet, there is nothing children need more than their parents presence and involvement. Money cannot buy time with mom and dad. A child needs her parents; not a substitute. In the early years she needs uninterrupted contact with her mother. No matter how wonderful the nanny or the daycare, it is a part time “orphanage.” It is not what the child needs. No one loves the child like his own parents. Nature made no mistake providing parents to every child. Society at large is greatly impacted by the trend of substitute care
for children.

When children are raised by anyone other than their parents, their need for a one-on-one intimate, deep, loving and physical connection is missing. The incredible amount of violence, addictions, depression and other emotional dysfunctions are a direct result of growing up with the unexplainable sense of lack that comes from growing up short on intimate connection with one’s parents.

One way to grasp the meaning of this distortion of nature is to recall the impact of premature birth. For nine month the baby MUST be inside the mother’s uterus. Shortening this time even a little has serious consequences for the child’s wellbeing.Like the womb for the first nine-month, the mother child connection is the next natural phase.

When a mother gives birth naturally and without separating from the newborn; when she breastfeeds on cue and holds her baby in arms at all times, including co-sleeping; she will not be able to leave her baby with another. Breastfeeding on cue (can be every fifteen minutes) and uninterrupted physical closeness is nature’s way to create a bond that is not breakable. It is the way nature insures that the baby and young child will have his primal needs for uninterrupted connection with his mother, fully met.

We can easily be fooled to believe that little toddlers and children in substitute care are thriving. This is because they learn to give up what they truly need (they have no choice) and live up to our expectations. But something is missing. Many childhood difficult behaviors are a direct result of the missing uninterrupted connection with parents.

As they grow older, they might seek that missing bond in food, drugs, shopping, co-dependent relationships, compulsive sex, and other “substitutes,” without knowing what drives these behaviors. In the process, a very competitive society is created; one of seeking the illusive missing link and competing for getting it and for selling all these substitutes. This leads to trends of domination, greed and disconnection.

Societies, whose children’s primal needs are fully met, grow up into peaceful and happy people who have no need to compete, dominate or control but rather enjoy cooperation and peaceful connections.

Lorraine Esposito is the author of a fast selling parenting book:
“The Morning Peacemaker,How to Get Your Kids Out the
Door on Time without Saying (nagging) A Word”.The book is the result of 10 years research and hands-on experience and has received endorsements and praise from the medical community.

Lorraine was raised in the rural mid-west of the U.S.A. Her belief in unlimited possibilities transformed poverty and obesity into wealth in all areas of her life.

Lorraine is open and genuine with an intuitive ability to see the solutions to problems. Her energy and wit are magnetic making her a dynamic and captivating speaker.

Happy reading…

Sikaz: What are the causes of teenage disrespect and how could it be stopped?

Lorraine: Disrespectfulness does not suddenly appear when a child hits the teenage years; it just seems that way. If you think about a disrespectful comment from a teen, for example telling you that he or she thinks your limits regarding the Internet are stupid,  it only seems like a big disrespect because the issues and language around this topic are serious and mature.

A whole lot of trouble awaits an unsuspecting teen on the Internet and so the issue is serious. Your teen’s courage to stand up to your authority, set boundaries of her own, and demand to have a voice in her freedom are signs of budding maturity. However, if you think back to an earlier time, you’ll find the same “disrespect” but back then the issues weren’t serious and your child had less maturity.

For example, remember a time when your child was, say five years old, I’m sure there were times you set limits on activities that weren’t always agreeable to her. When she was five years old her response might have been to cry, whine, or to even throw a temper-tantrum. We don’t see those expressions as so much disrespect, but rather tend to chock them off to bratty behavior. I believe the two instances are really the same but only packaged differently.

When I coach parents regarding disrespectful/bratty behavior at any age, I make sure they understand what they are truly looking at first, and then help them plan a course of action.

Conflicts are inevitable for two big reasons:

A child is a unique individual with emotions, beliefs, desires, frustrations, and thoughts of his own. Contrary to popular belief, children are not just little clones of their parents and therefore will naturally have a different spin on everything. The foundational beliefs may be similar (or not) but the details and “feel” of everything will be unique to him.

For example, the belief that the family’s needs come before others may be a foundational belief shared by both parent and child but the child may define word family differently than his parents. A child, especially a teen, may define family as any person with whom he feels a very close bond. A parent may adhere strictly to blood relationships when defining family. When a child’s friend/familis in need, he might prioritize differently than a parent expects which can create conflict.

The other big reason for conflicts is the need for a child to separate from her parents. Through conflicts/debates people often discover their individuality.A teen, though maturing, often does not have the skill to keep a debate out of the emotional realm.

Teens often lack the language skills and objectivity and feel frustrated and out maneuvered. I think that’s why teens resort to shocking and hurtful language. They are just big five year olds stomping their feet and calling you a “meanie.” For a teenager, it feels unfair to be over ridden in decisions of importance and he or she will feel the need to demand to be heard.

I believe it is impossible to stop conflicts and, to some degree, disrespectful behavior. A parent can be less affected by conflict and disrespect by reminding herself why it is happening and trying to see the situation as a sign of budding independence rather than willful contempt.

By allowing for this bigger view, the parent can defuse the emotions and allow room for the teen’s need to establish individuality. If a parent understands the differences between her and her child and respects her child’s need to be unique, there is a beginning to compromise and resolution. Kids are very intuitive and know when they are being understood even when disagreed with. Your child will see you as a comrade not an enemy so that when arguments happen they won’t be horrible; you will always treat your comrades with more respect than you would your enemies.

Sikaz: What is your advice for those who are planning to be parents one day?

Lorraine: The best advice I can give to future parents is to have no expectations of temperament or personality for their child. The biggest set back for parents and the root of many teenage battles are in the tightly held expectations a parent has for their child’s likes, dislikes, skills, and personality.

When a child presents a desire for something that is unexpected by the parent, a parent will attempt to steer the child toward something more expected. That creates an internal conflict within the child that might not be seen for years. The small child will believe the parent’s ideas of properness or acceptable desires are more valid than their own for a long while.

The child will suppress their own calling until one day it cannot be suppressed and explodes out in all directions. My advice is to approach this new little person with curiosity and wonder so that you are open and amazed at the unique character that is
presented to you.

Sikaz: What is your opinion about books, seminar and workshops on parenting?

Lorraine: I think books, seminars, and workshops on parenting are terrific if they are specific and provide real solutions to problems. I found all too often that the books and professionals I turned to for help only gave me good advice but failed to give me the tools to implement the advice.

I knew a lot about the concepts of parenting and the workings of a kid’s mind but I had no idea how to pull that knowledge into reality and make it mean something. I wasted so much time trying to make changes in my family relationships using the wrong tools. It’s like putting old wine in a new bottle.
That’s one big reason I wrote The Morning Peacemaker, because I found a way that works and I’ve shared the whole process, from beginning to end. I know that my method will not be the perfect fit for all families but it is a very comprehensive start. Think of it like a recipe for chocolate cake.

The other “good advice” books and professionals tell you to make a chocolate cake but giving you a list of ingredients and showing you a picture of the delicious cake. These professionals think they told you enough so that you could go out and make that cake on your own. WRONG! The recipe they gave doesn’t have the measurements of the ingredients or the steps for combining the ingredients.

The recipe doesn’t have the oven temperature or baking time either. Maybe you could make the cake from a list of ingredients and a picture, but it would take a whole lot of trial and error before you got it right.

With The Morning Peacemaker, the chocolate cake recipe is complete and any parent wishing for the result can stir together all the ingredients as directed to create the cake. After understanding the method/recipe, a parent is then free to add more chocolate or less sugar if she likes to make the cake just perfect for her family. So, I only recommend books, seminars, and workshops when the professional is willing to give the full recipe for the cake he or she is teaching us to make.

Sikaz: Are parenting coaches relevant and helpful to parents?

Lorraine: Parenting coaches are more than relevant; they are the way to go for most families.A coach, by definition, helps people do things better. A coach is action oriented and since change only happens when ideas are put into play, a coach is often the best resource for a family wanting to make changes.

I’m no different than any other type of coach you might have experience with, such as a basketball or golf coach. Just like those coaches, I find out what you want to make better and we practice the skills that will actually make it better. It is my experience that most counselors and psychologists are interested in talking, talking, talking but leave you with nothing to actually do at the end of your 45-minute session.

The next week you return to talk and talk and talk some more. I wasted years doing this. A great coach pulls the ideas into reality and gets you moving. For some families, the need for medical professionals is very real. If you’re dealing with mental illness or other clinical issues, parents are wise to seek the care of a trained physician but I still encourage parents to have a great coach too. One does not exclude the other but can often speed results.

Sikaz: Some parents seem to be neglecting their parenting activities for their career, what is your opinion on this and its effects on the society at large?

Lorraine: I believe that people always do the very best they can, even when they clearly are not. Sometimes people just lack knowledge or skill or even have an internal conflict that is causing chaos within them. The actions taken may not look like the best from an outsiders view but for that person, considering all she deals with, I believe her actions are the very best possible.

So, the key to balancing career and family to ensure that nothing and no one, including the parent herself, are short changed is to understand the real issues behind her actions. A parent that pours all her energy into career may simply be avoiding situations at home that she doesn’t understand or is afraid to tackle.

Knowledge and skills make choosing to be with family easier. Other families have little choice in the hours dedicated to earning money away from home. Single parents, too, have many burdens that pull and push. Being organized so that the time a parent has with her children is very productive will be enough to ensure her children are prepared to one day be productive members of society. Teaching and nurturing are about quality not necessarily quantity. It’s all about the skills and knowledge a parent has that enables her to be effective and happy with herself and her children.

———————-

Dear reader,that’s about all in this interview.I hope you’ve enjoyed it just as l have.

You can visit Lorraine’s website at www.morningpeacemaker.com

Enjoy your parenting efforts.

Sikaz

As a parent you should try to understand the underlining factors that your kid  reject fruits which are certain to give the kid more nutritional value than the biscuits or sweets they prefer to eat instead.

Kids that eat sweets and biscuits are already hooked on the sweetness of the products and care less about  the so-called nutritional values that you bother yourself about.

Here are five ways to help your kid eat the fruits instead of the  sweets and biscuits that may later have negative consequences
health- wise:

1.Set a good example .You have to fall in love with fruits yourself to be able to convince your kid to stick to fruits and forget about sweets and biscuits that they seem to be in love with already.

2.Allow Your Kid to choose the exact fruits he want to eat instead of forcing the ones you like on him simply because of what you’ve read about such fruits in a magazine , heard on radio or watched on television.

3. Pack your freezer and refrigerator full of fruits so that it will be easy for the kid to get one to eat whenever he is feeling like taking a snack.

4. Don’t keep sweets or biscuits at home as you used to and warn everybody that will come in contact with your kid to desist from offering the kid any sweets or biscuits.They should give the kid fruits instead.

5. Be artistic and humorous as well. Dress your melon, carrots or plantain with faces that are funny. This will certainly attract the kid and he will want to play with the fruit before eating it.

There you are .Do the above and send a reply to me soonest.

Enjoy your parenting efforts.

Sikaz

This is an important subject that we all should feel very much attached to in order for the new generation of the human race keep coming and our world get expanded the right way.

Today we are experiencing teenagers who are becoming parents without really planning to be.It just happened by mistakes and suddenly they realised that they are already parents in their own right but without any knowledge of adequate know-how.

This is where the subject matter of this article comes in:

Won’t it be far better for all of us if parenting is taught as a subject in our schools especially at the very senior class level?

I feel we shou;ld now consider this.

Students who are already within the ages 16 and 19 need to know what parenting is all about so that they can decide on their own to either zip-up and never go into any unprotected sex with their partner or go into sex with the awareness that they would be responsible for the consequences of their sexual relationships.

What do you feel about this?

Enjoy your parenting efforts.

Sikaz

It is your duty as a parent to help your child to learn how to
visualize and create their own mental images perfectly
to their own advantage in all circumstances in order to become
highly creative.

The following are some of the ways by which you can help your
child to begin learning to visualize and create mental images
easily:

 1. Read to Your Child: You have to begin to read to your child, if you’ve not already formed the habit of doing so.Remember that what you want to do is to make the child begin to visualize and form mental images in his mind, therefore, you don’t need any picture book for this exercise.  
  
2. Use lots of expression as you read: Whenever you read you should use many expressions anytime a character in the story speaks. Better still, make sure that you give each character their own distinct voices. This will make the child have a picture of the character created in their mind.

3. Read aloud: You have to read the story aloud whenever you wan to  read to the child. This helps bring the story to life and make child  volunteer participant in the exercise.
  
 4. Make up a story: When you make up a story, you are encouraging the child to try and do their own story too. This is because the story  you may be making up could be about something that happened to you in the past.

 5. Read poetry: Poetry is known as the king of narration. Very short, precise and image-filled. It tends to have fewer pictures and a lot of  descriptive words, making it great for visualizing.

 6. Listen to books on CD or cassettes (audio books) with your child.You can tag such book as “mind movies.”

If all these are done, the child will without doubts become an image thinker and a highly motivated visualizer and creative person.

Enjoy your parenting efforts.

Sikaz

Should you worry yourself over this?

The answer is NO!

Life is meant to be spent to your personal benefit.

You can’t live your life to satisfy another person to your detriment.

The following are pieces of advice you  can make use of as a single parent:

* Never embarrass your children with the way you’re dating your new partner.

* Don’t keep late nights or sleep outside your home no matter the circumstance.

* Work hard and be there for your children whenever you’re needed.

* Don’t be tempted to bring men into your home.Yes, it’s your home quite right, but what lesson would you want your child to learn from you?

* Be ready to make sacrifices for the sake of your children. They are the reason you’re called a parent, mind you.

* Be strong and organise your life bur never to the  detriment of your children.

* Provide for the needs of your children so they could be like the children who still enjoy the company of both parents.

These are very valuable pieces of advice that you should always remember and commit to heart at all times.

Enjoy your parenting efforts.

Sikaz

The pity of it is that most parents who have teens around them seem not to be aware of these problems that their teens are facing every day of their lives.

Here are five problems of teens every parent must know about to become successsful parents:

1. Teens Won’t Take Responsibility -  By their tender nature,most teens won’t take responsibility for anything.Though they strongly believe that they have past the age whereby their parents should treat them like little children,the fact is that they hardly voluntarily subject themselves to taking respponsibility for  anything done or that should be done by them.

2.They go around being bored all the time – Have you noticed this in your teenage child?This is just natural with every teen.They are always very bored and they usually want to get themselves engaged in something to ‘kill’ the time. Anytime you observe this ,just get your child out to meet other teens in the neighbourhood where he or she can get engaged in  whatever will excite him or her.

3.Teens Lie - Teens are all the same no matter where they are from.They seem to like telling lies to everyone around them.Perhaps your teen doesn’t do that,then you should see him or her as an exception. Because teenagers don’t usually owned up anytime they are  caught on the wrong side of things.

4.Teens Are Usually Full of Anger – Yes, teens are very sensitive.They are easily  provoked.Anger mangement in teens is at the zero level most of the time.They walk about like a time-bomb that is  ready to explode at anytime.Check this out in your teens and be ready at all times to samguard him or her from exploding at the wrong time or in the wrong place.

5.Your teen may be into drugs with a bad crowd well.Your dear little ‘angel’may actually be dealing in drugs – You read that without your knowledge. And this is why you need to maintain a friendly and cordial relationship with your teen to get through to him or her anytime there ois a problem.

You have to be very close to understand what is going on in your  child’s life.If you are not frindly with eachother, the child will not disclose anything to you even if he is dealing in drug.You will only get to know if he leaves behind the telltales or signs of drugs anywhere in the house, and then it may be too late to control him because he might have become a real addict.

These are five of  the problems you may be having with your teenage child.Therefore you have to look out for them at all times in order to
be able to curb them before they get excalated.

Enjoy your parenting efforts.
Sikaz

There are many mothers out there who are not worthy of the name “mother” in the real sense of the word.

Mothers come in different shapes and manners across race,ethnicity or religious leaning. But being a good mother is universally acceptable as the best thing to being called a mother indeed.

It is therefore very essential that a person who is aspiring to give birth to her own babies  should learn to be a good mother to such a baby.

The following are tips that will make you a good mother, provided you do them.

* Be there for your children by providing there physical, emotional and financial needs at all  times.

* Provide avenue for your children to tell you whatever is bothering them.

* Be supportive to your children and inculcate good values in them.

* Encourage the things that give your children  joy as long as such things are not harmful to them.

* Support those things that will make them fulfill their dreams in life.

* Be approachable, you will never regret being so.

* Give your children reason to be confident that their mother will treat them well.

* Create a way to make your children express themselves irrespective of what it is they have to talk about.

* Love your children unconditionally.

* Be there for your children and never allow your devotion to your work be detrimental to the care of your children.

* Discipline your children where there is the need for it. But you must discipline in love.

Enjoy your parenting efforts.

Sikaz

Do you feel that you must be very careful, or perhaps extremely careful and caring about your only child to the extent that you must care for the child as if you’re caring for four other children you’ve not had.

Do you shower your only child with so much care that you’re even bothered about what others think of you and the way and manner you care for your only child?

Well, there is no harm in that.

I don’t hold anything against you for what you’re doing.After all it’s your life and that of your child.

However, l want to point your attention to the sins you may be committing unwittingly in your parenting activities while caring for your only child.

These are sins that you can avoid if only you are a little careful about your actions towards your only child.

The sins are so important in your child’s life that they should be of concern to you as a parent who truly loves his or her child to the extent of wanting to make whatever sacrifice there is to be made even at your own expense and possible negative effects on the child.

These are the sins of parenting an only child that you must try to avoid if you must make a success of  your parenting efforts:

1.Overindulging and overcompensating: You’re probably
overindulging your child without knowing it simply because he or child is the only child you have now.The consequences of this is that your child will not see life the real way it is. You’ve not allowed him or her to go through  the necessary hardships that will perhaps toughen him or her to become a person that could fit into whatever situation he or she may find himself or herself in life.

2.Treating your child like an adult: It’s a sin to go about treating your only child like an adult when he or she isn’t. This is a child and that’s the simple truth about the situation on ground.

Your child should be allowed to pass through the normal stages of human growth and nothing short of that would be tolerated. You can’t create a vacuum because nature will not allow that. Your child can’t jump over what he or she should naturally go through.

3.Over praising your child: Don’t be tempted to over praise your child no matter how impressed you’re with whatever activity he or she has performed to your satisfaction.

Don’t get me wrong! I’m trying to very careful here because l don’t want to be misunderstood completely.

You should praise your child if you’re impressed by what he or she has done. But you’ll be making a mistake if you over do it. Praise is a human need because we all thrive on praises shower on us by those who appreciate
what we’re doing or what we’ve done.

4. Overprotecting your child: Let your child know that you’re there for him or her at all times, but never be tempted to go beyond the normal by overprotecting the child.

What is wrong in overprotecting your child is simply that the child will never be wrong as far as you’re concerned. She or he will never learn the right lessons of life which is that all of us must strive and struggle for ourselves without relying on others to help us defend us at all times.

Let your child protect him or herself with a little contribution on your own part. By so doing the child will be developed and feel safe even when you’re not there to protect him or her.

5.Failing to make rules: The world is orderly simply because it’s guided by rules and order. For this reason we all must learn to go by the laws of nature for us to be peaceful in life.

If you fail to make rules that will guide your child’s life simply because the child is an only child, then you’re already showing the way to crisis and chaos in the child’s life because there will be no orderliness in the child’s life.

These are the five sins of parenting an only child which you should avoid as a concerned parent.

Enjoy your parenting efforts.

Sikaz